Guess who I bumped into

The other day I was taking a walk. I was walking along my usual route; I’ve taken this route for as long as I can remember. From a distance I could see a figure. I couldn’t make out what it was and so I decided to get closer. The closer I got, the more I realised that this was actually a human being, standing at this corner. This human figure intrigued me and so, out of curiosity and a helpless sense of being drawn into it, I decided to get even closer. With each step I took, I was slowly able to make out who exactly this person was. With each step, he looked more and more familiar; until I could tell who exactly he was:

It was me.

I asked him how long has he been there, and he told me that he has always been there. He said he has seen me taking my walks everyday. He said he would watch me and that’s all he would do. I asked him how come I’ve never seen him before, and he told me that he has an idea as to why that is, but he can’t tell me. He said I would walk right past him without even saying hello. I carried on with my walk and I really started to chew on the fact that I just passed myself standing at the corner. For me that wasn’t even the strange part. What I couldn’t understand was how I have walked passed myself for all these years, without noticing.

That was when the answer came to me. I realised that I had never noticed myself because my mind was too occupied. Occupied with insecurities. Insecurities that I blamed other people for, without realising that although they may have planted the seed; it was I that watered it. My mind was too occupied with what people would say and think of me. It was too occupied with where I ‘fit in’ in society. My mind was filled with names that I didn’t like. It was filled with images of pointed fingers accompanied with cruel laughs from all around me.

Then I started to wonder why I saw myself today for the first time; what changed? The answer came quicker than a lightning bolt. I realised it was because this time my heart and mind were filled with the right things. My heart and my mind were occupied with kind words that have been whispered to me by the right people; people whose voices I should’ve been listening to from the first place. Both were filled with the right kind of laughter, the kind that comes with hugs and pictures with great big pearly whites flashing in them…

Ever since, I have not passed myself without saying hello. Every time I take my walk now, I smile and wave at that figure. And each day, the sun shines brighter, and the skies get clearer…

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